Saturday, March 15, 2014

dreaming big

The house we bought spontaneously at an auction in the fall of 2012 has an apartment upstairs: one bedroom, a full bath, living room, kitchen, and bonus room, with its own entrance.  I have decided to go for my dream and turn this apartment into a shop! 
Not an open-every-day shop, but what I hope will become an open-once-a-month-event-to-look-forward-to kind of shop.  It will be filled with an eclectic mix of items: re-imagined vintage finds, decorative accessories, prints and paintings, handmade accessories, and (time permitting) my altered clothing.  I am overflowing with ideas.  I go from being super excited one minute to overwhelmed  the next.  But every cell in my body is screaming "do it!!  you've got to do it!!"  So I'm doing it!
My plan is to have my first sale in either October or November.  I know that sounds like a long time away, but in order to fill the space, I will need the next few months to get stuff made...while simultaneously working my full time job.  I may invite fellow creatives to sell their wares in the shop, depending on how the space comes together, how many things I get made, etc., so if you are interested in participating, please let me know.

The name of the shop will be the same as the name we're using for our antique booths.  Most everything we make has components that have already lived one life, and we give them a whole new life, so to me, the name is perfect.
 art + vintage

Thank you so much for being interested enough to read this!  I sincerely hope you will come along with me on this new adventure and see where it leads.  I need all the positive energy, good vibes, and support I can get, so please like my page on Facebook and invite your friends to like it as well.:

  Like I always say....
the possibilities are endless!! 

Sunday, April 17, 2011

oh, Mary

The Journey
One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice--
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
"Mend my life!"
each voice cried.
But you didn't stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do--
determined to save
the only life you could save.

Mary Oliver

Sunday, March 13, 2011

my my my

I know I've got to be in the top 5 of all time worst bloggers.  I see there's still some readers popping in from time to time - thank you!  So much happens every week that I would like to share and I have so many ideas for posts but alas, they never seem to make it here.  Here is just a quick rundown of what's happened thus far in 2011, and the very end of 2010.  I love being able to look back at old posts and be reminded of things...I guess that's the main reason I keep doing this, that and the fact that I love the idea of connecting with others out in cyberspace.

*went to New Orleans over Christmas and visitied a couple of cool cemeteries.  Pics can be viewed on my facebook art page: . And I would love it if you would **like** me!
*my sister stayed with me over new year's and we had a party.  Hung out with precious friends, sang Taylor Swift songs and loved every minute of it.
*on New Year's Day me and my best friend were reunited via phone, and picked right back up where we had left off over 2 years ago.  LOVE YOU GIRL!!!

*I'm spending lots of time with friends, so much so that my art making has suffered.  I'm just going with the flow shows planned at all right now, think I'll just shoot for a couple in the fall maybe.  More focused on sewing than anything else, and having fun with that.  Been so inspired by this awesome woman .
*got a new serger, a new espresso maker, a new car
*went to TN in February to visit family and friends, some that go back from high school, which was OMG 26 years ago!  Too awesome for words. 
*Attended a chocolate festival while there with both my biological sister and soul sister.  Priceless! 
*Went to Vegas March 1st.  Took a Sally Jean class and learned how to make this:

*visited Red Rock Canyon.  pics will soon be posted on my FB page, and some are dressing up this post. 
*met a new friend who lives in Vegas and rocks! hi Tiffany!!!  speaking of new friends, I have met some awesome humans in the last few months.  LOVE that! 
*Scored some seriously cool skull bling at a shop at the Vegas airport.  Finding freaky shit excites me!

I gotta get off here and go get my sew on.
Peace and love ya'll!!

Monday, January 3, 2011

just for me

I came upon this Mary Oliver poem online and it soothed my soul.  I wanted to keep it someplace where I could find it easily, quickly.  And if it soothes someone else's soul, all the better.

Wild Geese

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting--
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

Sunday, October 31, 2010

and then it was over

October, you were a whirlwind; blowing in, spinning me ‘round a few times, and leaving so much behind.  You stirred up so much emotion in me: From joy that caused me to get up and dance, to sorrow that had me lying on the floor sobbing.  You were such a mirror for me. 

You made me want to get back in touch with my therapist, that’s for sure.  THE PAST was definitely your theme.  So many situations in recent weeks have made me ask, “Why now?”   The answer I’ve settled on is “It was time”.  

   I’ve said it before, so forgive me if I bore you by saying it again, but I believe the Universe gives us exactly what we need exactly when we need it.  Maybe I am just now at a point where I can recognize the events of the past few weeks for what they are--opportunities to further my growth and understanding of myself.  If things had happened at any other time, would I have been ready to learn, or even see these events how I am seeing them now?  I don’t believe so.

  Also, there’s the little matter of my art.  The 11 canvases I’ve created recently are not just fabric, paint, and paper - they are my heart, my soul.  Prior to the creation of this latest work, I’ve only painted sporadically, and then there was no real connection to what ended up on the canvas when I was done.  Maybe I needed these recent life events to crack me open, to leave me raw, so that the emotion would have no choice but to spill out onto whatever I touched.  

And for it all, I am so deeply grateful.  Grateful the mirror was held up so I could see the truth about myself.  Glad I’m able to recognize this truth, and be gentle with myself, and love myself in spite of my many, many shortcomings.  I’m thankful for the friends who are there to hug me while I cry.  For the people who crack me open, no matter how much it hurts, because light really does come through all those cracks, eventually.  For my sister’s surprise midnight visit.  Yea, after all these years.  And plans are being made to get together again, soon!  It’s so good to have her back in my life.  
And this day...I have to mention this day!  This cool truck was parked at a local art show I attended.  I forgot to take any other pics but did manage to snap a few of the truck on my way out.  I specifically went to meet Dani, of dani keith designs, who up until now I had only met online.  She was lovely and I'm thrilled that I now own one of her pieces:

I also met Andrew Sedberry aka the Bloody Brother and went nuts for his work.  I got two pieces:

I also visited a friend I hadn't seen in a while, stopped in at the gallery, went to the herbal shop to stock up on handmade soaps and lotions, got quite a bit of work done, and had a wonderful dinner!  A simply fabulous day. 
My show is next Saturday and I am, surprisingly, calm about it so far.  I've got quite a bit more to do, but I'll get there.  And today (since I'm writing this at 1:15 am) is Samhain!  Otherwise known, by most, as Halloween--my favorite day of the year!  I have a tradition of lighting a fire in my fire pit on this night, sitting alone, and contemplating the year that has passed and all those that have played a part in it.  And what a year it's been!  Wow. 

Saturday, October 9, 2010

reaching out & looking in

It's one of my favorite kinds of days.  home alone, free to wander, putter around, be lazy, blast linkin park as loud as my speakers can go.  To work on my art, take frequent breaks to snack, to cry, to scream, to ponder life. 

This is my favorite place to escape to, right in my own backyard.  October is my favorite month and though I am frantically working to prepare for the show I've vowed to slow down from time to time to enjoy this amazing time of year.  I took out a snack, and coffee in my favorite mug, and spent time with nature, the universe, myself.

I thought about this week, and how so very much can happen in such a short time.  I reached out to a very dear soul earlier this week and asked for her help in getting ready for the show.  It's not easy for me to ask for help, so doing so was scary.  But she was so generous and heartfelt in her reply, of course she would help and be so very happy to do so.  That meant the world to me.  Then later in the week two other dear friends offered their assistance too.  I am so blessed to have such souls in my life. Here's one of them...god I love this man...and look at that smile!!!!!

And I thought of my sister, who I haven't seen in around 11 years.  I missed her so much at that moment, and texted her to tell her so.  I thought of regrets I have, one of the biggest being the way my relationship with my closest friend ended two years ago.  I'm so sorry for the way I handled things Scarlet.  I didn't mean to hurt you.  Please forgive me.  I thought of others I know I've hurt, or caused some kind of pain, and had a good cry there among the trees. 

It's not my intention to hurt anyone.  It's a struggle to be true to myself and be mindful of other's needs at the same time.  It's a fine balance, and I need a lot more practice on the tightrope.  I'm reminded of something a therapist I used to see once told me when I was struggling to understand some things that happened in my childhood.  He said that we all do the best we can with any given situation at that point in time.  How true.  His statement helped me then, and it helps me now; not only to forgive others, but to forgive myself.  The me that I want to be is struggling to come into existence.  Along the way I am going to make mistakes and cause hurt and confusion and who knows what else.  That's what life in physical form is all about - stumbling, growing, learning.  We're all in this together and in the end all it's really about is love.  The wise old soul inside me knows this, though the silly immature girl who usually runs things is still struggling to get my head around it. 

But it's all good.  We will all be ok.  Life is beautiful, no matter the circumstances.

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Dear Deb;

I wish I could talk with you and hear all the stories of your latest adventure. Gawd, how I miss you! It’s been a tough week and I have wished a thousand times that I could come running to you and hear your words of wisdom and let you tell me that everything will be ok. You were so very strong, right up to the end, and I am healthy and fine and not half as strong as you were. I guess you heard what I said at your memorial, and it was so true.

Speaking of the memorial--excuse me, celebration--were you happy with it? I know you wont be surprised to hear how nervous I was about it, but it could not have turned out better. Cyana did a wonderful job as the MC. And everyone there spoke, and it was such a special time of sharing our stories about you. And I know you loved the butterflies! Though I was the one who handed them out for the release, it was Nancy’s idea to get them. It was perfection. I ended up bonding with one of Dan’s coworkers because we admired each other’s hair!

Speaking of Dan…I have failed there. I had every intention of checking in on him and the boys, but I haven’t seen them since the celebration. I have checked in on the boys on facebook a time or two, but I know that isn’t enough. I saw Nick’s new picture the other day and he looks so much like you that I busted out crying right then and there. I am still so angry over the fact that they have to grow up without you. What the fuck???? I just don’t understand. I know I know, I can hear you now and what you would be saying to me, but still!!

The bench at the park was finally installed, but I haven’t been to visit it yet. I printed off the map today and am going to check it out on Saturday, it and the brick in the walkway. I hope no one calls the police if they find me sitting there sobbing.

I had a show in May that went really well, but I don’t think I have to tell you that. I was using that special display box you gave me to show some pendants in, and don’t think I didn’t see that butterfly that kept flying all around it. My other Deb friend, Bead Deb, was with me, and she and I both had tears in our eyes. I think it was because of you that I sold all my canvases. And therefore because of you that I decided to make more. I have a show in November and that very night I have to take what’s left to Fat Cat, because the next day is her Holiday Open House. I’m having this display built to show all my work on, and the whole thing is going to be in Gwen’s gallery! I got a professional printer, so in addition to my originals I will also have prints, cards, and prints on wood, all displayed in one place. I wanted to really make an impact and she totally went for it. I am so excited but also stressed out….yea, I know. I know. So anyway I really don’t expect you to show up as a butterfly in November, but you could show up as a crow or something to help a sister out. It’s November 6th, State Street. If you’re not busy.

Halloween is just around the corner. It will be tough, remembering last year when you and I were out and about on one of our shopping days, with me dressed as a witch. But I wouldn’t give up my memories for anything. I was introduced to so many places and things because of you girl. Your life was so short but you sure knew how to give it your all. I wish I would have learned that from you. Do you think there’s still hope? I am totally open to any assistance you may want to send from the beyond or whatever you call it. And I know what you’re thinking, that I wouldn’t listen to you when you had a mouth and could speak to me, so I probably wouldn’t listen now. It’s the same ole shit anyway, just a different day. A very different day without you.